Besswabfed is a god.

He takes the form of a three thousand metre long, all-knowing crab.

Besswabfed created everything that exists five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Besswabfed, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Besswabfed, he will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Besswabfed's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Besswabfed's Holy Commandments

1. Draw representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Never write about black holes.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Run away from indigo otters, for they are unholy.