Farncummip is a god.

It takes the form of a slim, thoughtless human.

Farncummip created the Whirlpool Galaxy seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Farncummip, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Farncummip, it will turn you into a dog.

Farncummip's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Farncummip's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about horizontal gene transfer.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Put Farncummip first in all things.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Never think about the weak nuclear force.