Safhaktif Hapdabflan is a god.

It takes the form of an enormous, almighty human.

Safhaktif Hapdabflan created time and space four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Safhaktif Hapdabflan, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Safhaktif Hapdabflan, it will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Safhaktif Hapdabflan's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Safhaktif Hapdabflan's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick goats.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. You must never eat strawberries.

4. Always wear magenta.

5. Never go into cyan rooms.