Fitfonloop is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, capable guinea pig.

Fitfonloop created Africa three million years ago.

If you believe in Fitfonloop, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Fitfonloop, it will turn you into a giant slug.

Fitfonloop's most sacred site is Ylike in Finland.

Fitfonloop's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate doves.

2. Never feed carrots to grasshopers while wearing tights.

3. Never look at stars.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Erect a large copper sculpture of Fitfonloop on top of all buildings.