Ontzodtof is a god.

He takes the form of a three thousand metre long, weak owl.

Ontzodtof created the Large Magellanic Cloud eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Ontzodtof, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Ontzodtof, he will destroy your favourite solar system.

Ontzodtof's most sacred site is Dornbock in Germany.

Ontzodtof's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat onions.

2. Always treat ants with great respect.

3. Do not wear orange clothing.

4. Always wear white.

5. Never paint your legs turquoise.