Artxucbaf is a god.

She takes the form of a six thousand metre long, slow hare.

Artxucbaf created a bottom quark eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Artxucbaf, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Artxucbaf, she will attempt to scare you with hail.

Artxucbaf's most sacred site is Gorbio in France.

Artxucbaf's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Draw representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Never write about spacetime.

5. Never think about ribonucleic acid.