Bassontyat is a god.

It takes the form of a six hundred metre long, boastful toad.

Bassontyat created humanity five million years ago.

If you believe in Bassontyat, it will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Bassontyat, it will have a low opinion of you.

Bassontyat's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Bassontyat's Holy Commandments

1. Learn eight new languages a year.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Bassontyat.

3. Never feed onions to nematodes while wearing shoes.

4. Always treat porpoises with great respect.

5. Always take life seriously.