Gettanbincimjin is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, unfair aardvark.

Gettanbincimjin created Europe two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gettanbincimjin, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Gettanbincimjin, it will turn you into a hamster.

Gettanbincimjin's most sacred site is Bodieve in England.

Gettanbincimjin's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from mauve great tits for they are unholy.

2. Do not wear green clothing.

3. Never talk about gravity near frogs while wearing blue shorts.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Never look at galaxies.