Cidnartcem is a god.

She takes the form of a very heavy, irritating snake.

Cidnartcem created life eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cidnartcem, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Cidnartcem, she will turn you into a duck.

Cidnartcem's most sacred site is Sarti in Greece.

Cidnartcem's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about optics.

2. Do not shave your feet.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Do not wear turquoise clothing.