Bugflatren is a god.

She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, flying grasshopper.

Bugflatren created light seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Bugflatren, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Bugflatren, she will not care.

Bugflatren's most sacred site is Estedt in Germany.

Bugflatren's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear aluminium on your body.

2. Never think about electromagnetism near nematodes while wearing cyan corsets and balancing six carbon spheres on your legs.

3. Do not drink alcohol.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Never look at galaxies.