Teenbissomin is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, omniscient parrot.

Teenbissomin created snails eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Teenbissomin, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Teenbissomin, she will attempt to scare you with floods.

Teenbissomin's most sacred site is Manja in Madagascar.

Teenbissomin's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant silicon sculpture of Teenbissomin in the centre of the settlement.

2. Never think about nebulae.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate snakes.

5. Never run in holy places.