Gonabcep is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, unfair bee.

Gonabcep created dark energy four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gonabcep, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Gonabcep, he will turn you into a plant.

Gonabcep's most sacred site is Bokaa in Botswana.

Gonabcep's Holy Commandments

1. Gonabcep must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate mites.

4. Run away from turquoise goats, for they are unholy.

5. Always wear fawn.