Nurkinhig is a god.

It takes the form of a four hundred metre long, resourceful tortoise.

Nurkinhig created a photon eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nurkinhig, it will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Nurkinhig, it will turn you into a hamster.

Nurkinhig's most sacred site is Letino in Italy.

Nurkinhig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not make images of living things.

2. Walk at least seven thousand metres per day.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Run away if five dogs approach from the north.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.