Cidbetkabmut is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, kind slug.

Cidbetkabmut created humankind seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cidbetkabmut, he will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Cidbetkabmut, he will not care.

Cidbetkabmut's most sacred site is Rautio in Finland.

Cidbetkabmut's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Cidbetkabmut's name in vain.

2. Erect a giant black sculpture of Cidbetkabmut in the centre of the settlement.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Run away from cyan dolphins, for they are unholy.

5. Never sit near ants.