Gedcapbum Dimloopbaf is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, compassionate armadillo.

Gedcapbum Dimloopbaf created the world two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gedcapbum Dimloopbaf, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Gedcapbum Dimloopbaf, it will turn you into an amoeba.

Gedcapbum Dimloopbaf's most sacred site is Borolong in Botswana.

Gedcapbum Dimloopbaf's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. Never think about chromosomes.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.