Fasgenarp is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, humorless parrot.

Fasgenarp created everything that exists five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fasgenarp, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Fasgenarp, he will destroy your favourite planet.

Fasgenarp's most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.

Fasgenarp's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about quantum field theory near aardvarks while wearing black corsets.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Fasgenarp.

3. Never talk about enzymes.

4. Do not kill hamsters.

5. You must love Fasgenarp.