Fonbab is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, conceited scorpion.

Fonbab created oxygen six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fonbab, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Fonbab, he will try to impress you with rainbows.

Fonbab's most sacred site is Alyki in Greece.

Fonbab's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat gulls with great respect.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Fonbab.

4. Always help sick dogs.

5. Never talk about electromagnetism near voles while wearing white scarves and balancing eight gold spheres on your legs.