Flowcebrutt is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, loving capybara.

Flowcebrutt created viruses four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Flowcebrutt, he will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Flowcebrutt, he will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Flowcebrutt's most sacred site is Iskmo in Finland.

Flowcebrutt's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Learn nine new languages a year.

3. Flowcebrutt must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate ants.

5. Flowcebrutt loves great tits, so they must be honoured.