Flowgencan is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, able dryad.

Flowgencan created bats nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Flowgencan, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Flowgencan, he will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Flowgencan's most sacred site is Ilmola in Finland.

Flowgencan's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if four bats approach from the north.

2. Erect three silver sculptures of Flowgencan on top of important buildings.

3. You must pray to Flowgencan eight times a day.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Always help sick dogs.