Tunvedtarp is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, witty squid.

Tunvedtarp created tapeworms five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tunvedtarp, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Tunvedtarp, it will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Tunvedtarp's most sacred site is Cudillero in Spain.

Tunvedtarp's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat grapes.

2. Paint representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place in black.

3. Run away from red ants, for they are unholy.

4. Never talk about doves.

5. Do not cook food in pots.