Farngupvan is a god.

He takes the form of a slender, smart jackal.

Farngupvan created silver seven million years ago.

If you believe in Farngupvan, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Farngupvan, he will denounce you as a heretic.

Farngupvan's most sacred site is Dumadumana in Botswana.

Farngupvan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your feet.

2. Never think about amino acids.

3. Do not eat limes.

4. Do not sing in public.

5. Always pray immersed in water.