Dunkomarn is a god.

It takes the form of a three hundred metre long, unselfish dugong.

Dunkomarn created viruses seven million years ago.

If you believe in Dunkomarn, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Dunkomarn, it will destroy your home galaxy.

Dunkomarn's most sacred site is Phepheng in Botswana.

Dunkomarn's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at moons.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Feed all hungry mites.

5. Dunkomarn loves snails, so they must be honoured.