Farnfunpan is a god.

She takes the form of a huge, clever chicken.

Farnfunpan created time and space nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Farnfunpan, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Farnfunpan, she will turn you into a hamster.

Farnfunpan's most sacred site is Pontelandolfo in Italy.

Farnfunpan's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed limes to snakes while wearing hats.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Erect a giant iron sculpture of Farnfunpan in the centre of the settlement.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.