Fetgonnut is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, contented eagle.

Fetgonnut created a bottom quark six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fetgonnut, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Fetgonnut, he will manifest in front of you.

Fetgonnut's most sacred site is Manja in Madagascar.

Fetgonnut's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your head.

2. Never think about moons.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Do not kill foxes.