Betkadcussgeb is a god.

It takes the form of a galaxy-sized, tranquil chicken.

Betkadcussgeb created snails four years ago.

If you believe in Betkadcussgeb, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Betkadcussgeb, it will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Betkadcussgeb's most sacred site is Hetta in Finland.

Betkadcussgeb's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about deoxyribonucleic acid.

2. Hide if eight turtles approach from the south.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Never run in holy places.

5. Never go into gray rooms.