Fethitbag is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, charitable dove.

Fethitbag created an up quark seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fethitbag, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Fethitbag, she will send you a strongly worded letter.

Fethitbag's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Fethitbag's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Never talk about chromosomes.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.