Hadtigbap is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, clever swallow.

Hadtigbap created the Sun nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Hadtigbap, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Hadtigbap, she will curse you with boils.

Hadtigbap's most sacred site is Altata in Mexico.

Hadtigbap's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least nine thousand metres per day.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Do not trade with those who eat peanuts.