Parkfemlen is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, self-confident mongoose.

Parkfemlen created humankind nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Parkfemlen, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Parkfemlen, he will attempt to scare you with floods.

Parkfemlen's most sacred site is Pedraza in Spain.

Parkfemlen's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of carbon.

3. Never feed nuts to goats while wearing hats.

4. Never think about asteroids.

5. Always look after injured dolphins.