Pitsistan is a god.

It takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, unjust bat.

Pitsistan created the cosmos nine million years ago.

If you believe in Pitsistan, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Pitsistan, it will turn you into a worm.

Pitsistan's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Pitsistan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair purple.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Do not stand on grass.