Rantanpogdin is a god.

It takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, charitable beaver.

Rantanpogdin created the planet Venus four million years ago.

If you believe in Rantanpogdin, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Rantanpogdin, it will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Rantanpogdin's most sacred site is Monong in Botswana.

Rantanpogdin's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Rantanpogdin.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Never feed spinach to frogs while wearing magenta hats.

5. Erect a large tin sculpture of Rantanpogdin on top of all buildings.