Vegmilwee is a god.

It takes the form of a six hundred metre long, awe-inspiring armadillo.

Vegmilwee created a bottom quark nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vegmilwee, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Vegmilwee, it will send two she bears to sort you out.

Vegmilwee's most sacred site is Zlatolist in Bulgaria.

Vegmilwee's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Vegmilwee three times a day.

2. Run away if six bats approach from the west.

3. Do not trade with those who eat onions.

4. Vegmilwee loves goats, so they must be honoured.

5. Always take life seriously.