Tigfedtad Gilkadyarldodbognanhom is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, unsympathetic zebra.

Tigfedtad Gilkadyarldodbognanhom created the solar system four million years ago.

If you believe in Tigfedtad Gilkadyarldodbognanhom, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Tigfedtad Gilkadyarldodbognanhom, it will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Tigfedtad Gilkadyarldodbognanhom's most sacred site is Penpont in Scotland.

Tigfedtad Gilkadyarldodbognanhom's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about galaxies.

2. Never think about chromosomes.

3. Tigfedtad Gilkadyarldodbognanhom must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.