Gomhantarpril is a god.

She takes the form of a very heavy, contented turtle.

Gomhantarpril created the solar system eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gomhantarpril, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Gomhantarpril, she will remove you from existence.

Gomhantarpril's most sacred site is Daraina in Madagascar.

Gomhantarpril's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Hide from gray horses for they are unholy.

3. Paint representations of nebulae on the walls of your dwelling space.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.