Panhenken is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, duplicitous snail.

Panhenken created oxygen eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Panhenken, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Panhenken, he will turn you into a giant snail.

Panhenken's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Panhenken's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about photosynthesis.

2. Never leap near shrews.

3. Pray towards the south.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Retreat if four seals approach from the north.