Tonkstragpascap is a god.

She takes the form of a planet-sized, slow parrot.

Tonkstragpascap created the Whirlpool Galaxy nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tonkstragpascap, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Tonkstragpascap, she will send you a strongly worded letter.

Tonkstragpascap's most sacred site is Saint Cado in France.

Tonkstragpascap's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if six snails approach from the south.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Erect a giant white sculpture of Tonkstragpascap in the centre of the settlement.

5. Do not cook food in pots.