Babcunkar is a god.

It takes the form of a large, dishonourable wren.

Babcunkar created Asia three billion years ago.

If you believe in Babcunkar, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Babcunkar, it will strike you with lightening.

Babcunkar's most sacred site is Goat's Hole Cave in England.

Babcunkar's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate dogs.

2. Paint representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling space in magenta.

3. Always wear indigo.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Do not stand on grass.