Negbin is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, overgenerous turtle.

Negbin created tapeworms seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Negbin, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Negbin, she will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Negbin's most sacred site is Kottucherry in India.

Negbin's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention squirrels.

2. Never talk about electromagnetism near doves while wearing fawn boots and balancing five gold spheres on your hands.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Never write about black holes.

5. Never talk about fire.