Vonkvolrull is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, deceitful crow.

Vonkvolrull created a Higgs boson nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vonkvolrull, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Vonkvolrull, it will not care at all.

Vonkvolrull's most sacred site is Kottucherry in India.

Vonkvolrull's Holy Commandments

1. Vonkvolrull loves squirrels, so they must be respected.

2. Never mention foxes.

3. Do not eat spinach.

4. Do not kill sheep.

5. Always treat snails with great respect.