Davjarnlab is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, intelligent alligator.

Davjarnlab created the Milkyway eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Davjarnlab, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Davjarnlab, she will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Davjarnlab's most sacred site is Polydrosos in Greece.

Davjarnlab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.