Jampinster is a god.

He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, prudent crane.

Jampinster created the Large Magellanic Cloud two million years ago.

If you believe in Jampinster, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Jampinster, he will send minions to preach to you.

Jampinster's most sacred site is Artena in Italy.

Jampinster's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large zinc sculpture of Jampinster on top of all buildings.

2. Never talk about gravity.

3. Do not speak about onions.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Do not take Jampinster's name in vain.