Godcutzedtomflanhakontfat is a god.

It takes the form of a very long, narcissistic porpoise.

Godcutzedtomflanhakontfat created the planet Mars five million years ago.

If you believe in Godcutzedtomflanhakontfat, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Godcutzedtomflanhakontfat, it will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Godcutzedtomflanhakontfat's most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.

Godcutzedtomflanhakontfat's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if seven cats approach from the east.

2. Seals are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Never paint your head fawn.

4. Erect nine platinum sculptures of Godcutzedtomflanhakontfat on top of important buildings.

5. Do not hurt eagles.