Soglinsig is a god.

She takes the form of a very small, all-knowing seal.

Soglinsig created viruses nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Soglinsig, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Soglinsig, she will turn you into a mouse.

Soglinsig's most sacred site is Pontelandolfo in Italy.

Soglinsig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not chop down trees.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate sharks.