Vanbomcan is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, moody swan.

Vanbomcan created a quark three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Vanbomcan, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Vanbomcan, he will jump up and down on your head.

Vanbomcan's most sacred site is Ylike in Finland.

Vanbomcan's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention geese.

2. Retreat if seven rats approach from the west.

3. Never skip in the presence of tapirs.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Never run in holy places.