Sandstangub is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, happy yak.

Sandstangub created a photon six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Sandstangub, he will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Sandstangub, he will destroy your home planet.

Sandstangub's most sacred site is Snapp in Sweden.

Sandstangub's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear orange clothing.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of zinc.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Retreat if five turtles approach from the north.