Latpodpidmon is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, wise hamster.

Latpodpidmon created the planet Mars two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Latpodpidmon, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Latpodpidmon, he will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Latpodpidmon's most sacred site is Quenstedt in Germany.

Latpodpidmon's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the north.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Never eat peanuts.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.