Gangepten is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, able crow.

Gangepten created everything that exists five million years ago.

If you believe in Gangepten, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Gangepten, she will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Gangepten's most sacred site is Uruachi in Mexico.

Gangepten's Holy Commandments

1. Gangepten loves birds, so they must be respected.

2. Tapirs are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Worship no other gods but Gangepten.

4. Never talk about dark matter near seals while wearing black jumpers and balancing eight iron spheres on your legs.

5. Always help dolphins.