Tabyakgep is a god.

She takes the form of a small, all-knowing parrot.

Tabyakgep created carbon nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Tabyakgep, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Tabyakgep, she will send you a strongly worded letter.

Tabyakgep's most sacred site is Chettipet in India.

Tabyakgep's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Tabyakgep.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Erect a giant zinc sculpture of Tabyakgep in the centre of the settlement.

5. Worship no other gods but Tabyakgep.