Minwigflig is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely thin, quiet turtle.

Minwigflig created a down quark two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Minwigflig, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Minwigflig, he will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Minwigflig's most sacred site is Ilmola in Finland.

Minwigflig's Holy Commandments

1. Learn seven new languages a year .

2. Never wear shirts.

3. Never go into mauve rooms.

4. You must love Minwigflig.

5. Never hurt sharks.