Godnurlhiv Bigjatmil is a god.

She takes the form of a huge, irritating wyvern.

Godnurlhiv Bigjatmil created the solar system three billion years ago.

If you believe in Godnurlhiv Bigjatmil, she will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Godnurlhiv Bigjatmil, she will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Godnurlhiv Bigjatmil's most sacred site is Hobeck in Germany.

Godnurlhiv Bigjatmil's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Godnurlhiv Bigjatmil.

2. Never feed tomatoes to dolphins while wearing yellow ear rings.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Never wear rings.

5. Put Godnurlhiv Bigjatmil first in all things.