Lamyartpod is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, able wasp.

Lamyartpod created the cosmos six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Lamyartpod, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Lamyartpod, he will turn you into a mouse.

Lamyartpod's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Lamyartpod's Holy Commandments

1. Never laugh in the presence of shrews.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Hide from violet goats for they are unholy.

4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Lamyartpod.

5. Never paint your face purple.